If I could settle down, then I would settle down.

New York City is too beautiful to spend any time inside that I don’t have to, and as a result summer blogging is pretty slow and meaningless (see post below). Expect a ton of Youtube videos for a while.

Let’s start with THIS:

Malkmus’ face from 4:05 to 4:15 is actually the sexiest thing ever.

Possible personalized license plates…

H1N1

MASTR B8

Side note: How annoying is it that before Dry Your Eyes on The Last Waltz Neil Diamond says, “I’m going to do one song for you, but I’m going to do it good.”

If I could fit I H8 NEIL DIAMOND on a license plate, I would get a vanity plate.

You might think the worst thing in the world is pickle juice in your eye, but I assure you that the worst thing is a Hummer with a vanity plate.

If you want me to, Yes.

Fuck ja.

Keep the Mustard Belt in the U.S.A! [insert "U.S.A" chant here]

Someone keeps driving down 7th street blasting MJ so loud. This happened almost every night this week.

Usually I wouldn’t mind, but I must rouse early tomorrow to make my way to the Nathan’s hot dog eating competition on Coney Island. This must be what it’s like for goys on Christmas Eve or something. When I went to the competition last year, Joey Chestnut pulled the win, chomping 59 hot dogs in 10 minutes plus a five dog overtime. Who knows what is in store this year.

While there is certainly something highly objectionable about the insane amount of processed factory meat that will be guzzled tomorrow, I don’t know, God Bless America.

Meat in excess! Happy Independence Day, motherfuckers.

At least this rain is good for something

An article in The New York Times reports there are fewer homicides when summer is rainy than when it is sunny. That makes sense. No one likes to do work when it’s raining.

Once in a while a homicide pops up in the news, but I rarely think about murder rate in New York when I’m reading up on the goings on about town. There were some quotes that surprised me in this article. Did you know that there are about 17 murders every 10 days in the summer time in NYC? That is a whole lot, right? Well, apparently not. We are at an all time low in murders–the lowest since the 1960s.

Even though the numbers reflect lower rate of homicide in the rain, the article takes into account that evidence is easily washed away and there are less witnesses when it is raining. So these numbers are probably fuzzy. The police are known to “juke the stats” from time to time. You can just ask Bunny Colvin about that.

KEEP THE DEVIL DOWN IN THE HOLE.